{"id":622,"date":"2022-12-08T16:43:20","date_gmt":"2022-12-08T21:43:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/refocusingwido.wpenginepowered.com\/?p=622"},"modified":"2025-04-01T10:49:26","modified_gmt":"2025-04-01T15:49:26","slug":"examining-expectations","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/es\/examining-expectations\/","title":{"rendered":"Examinando las Expectativas"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Examinando las Expectativas<\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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Con el D\u00eda de Acci\u00f3n de Gracias recientemente pasado y la Navidad acerc\u00e1ndose r\u00e1pidamente, he\npasado alg\u00fan tiempo leyendo art\u00edculos, publicaciones y libros sobre c\u00f3mo el duelo afecta nuestra\ncapacidad para navegar con \u00e9xito las fiestas. Una b\u00fasqueda en Google producir\u00e1 literalmente cientos de\n"consejos \u00fatiles" y muchas ideas sobre c\u00f3mo podemos sobrevivir en las pr\u00f3ximas semanas. De hecho, le\u00ed\ntres libros esta semana con la palabra sobrevivir, supervivir o supervivencia en el tema.<\/p>

Eso me hizo comenzar a preguntarme cu\u00e1ndo una celebraci\u00f3n del nacimiento del Salvador, el que nos\ntrajo esperanza, se convirti\u00f3 en algo que debemos soportar o sobrevivir. \u00bfC\u00f3mo es que el\nacontecimiento m\u00e1s esperanzador de toda la historia humana se ha convertido en una carga para\nnosotros? La temporada navide\u00f1a es, sin duda, la \u00e9poca del a\u00f1o que genera m\u00e1s estr\u00e9s. \u00bfPero por qu\u00e9?\n\u00bfPor qu\u00e9 nos pesa tanto? \u00bfPor qu\u00e9 tantos est\u00e1n abrumados por emociones sofocantes y depresi\u00f3n\nparalizante?<\/p>

Varias fuentes que le\u00ed indicaron que las expectativas son la raz\u00f3n n\u00famero uno por la que nos sentimos\nabrumados por las fiestas. Seg\u00fan estos autores, esas expectativas pueden ser las que me impongo a m\u00ed\nmismo, o pueden provenir de otros que tienen sus propias expectativas sobre c\u00f3mo debo comportarme,\nreaccionar o qu\u00e9 debo hacer.<\/p>

\u00a1Crec\u00ed en Michigan, y en nuestra casa, la Navidad era una gran tarea anual! \u00a1Cada a\u00f1o era lo que mis\npropios hijos llamar\u00edan m\u00e1s tarde una "Navidad de Michigan"! La esper\u00e1bamos con ansias, era completa\ncon todos los adornos, incluso despu\u00e9s de que Dave y yo nos casamos y tuvimos nuestros propios hijos.\n\u00a1Y esa es la forma en que criamos a los nuestros! \u00a1La b\u00fasqueda del \u00e1rbol de Navidad perfecto, llevarlo a\ncasa y decorarlo, y agregar todas esas decoraciones de aluminio que hac\u00edan que el \u00e1rbol pareciera (como\ndijo una vez mi esposo) "una explosi\u00f3n de una f\u00e1brica de aluminio"! Horneamos galletas, pasamos una\ntarde decor\u00e1ndolas, creamos regalos para nuestros padres en el taller \u201csecreto\u201d de abajo. Luego, por\nsupuesto, estaba la compra, el envoltorio y el escondite bajo el \u00e1rbol. Ten\u00edamos un servicio especial a la\nluz de las velas de Nochebuena, y despu\u00e9s todos recib\u00edan su bolsa de dulces y cacahuates, y pap\u00e1 nos\nllevaba por toda la ciudad para ver las exhibiciones de luces navide\u00f1as. Luego estaba el programa\ninfantil del domingo antes de Navidad, para el cual todos memorizamos e interpret\u00e1bamos canciones y\nrecitaciones especiales para el deleite de las personas mayores de la congregaci\u00f3n. Tarjetas navide\u00f1as,\nregalos, luces, nieve, golosinas especiales y momentos familiares con abuelos, t\u00edas, t\u00edos y primos. \u00a1Era\nuna \u00e9poca maravillosa para ser ni\u00f1o.<\/p>

Este a\u00f1o me di cuenta de que en alg\u00fan momento interioric\u00e9 todas esas cosas para convertirlas en mis\npropias expectativas de c\u00f3mo deber\u00eda ser la Navidad para mi propia familia. Con el paso de los a\u00f1os,\ncreamos nuestras propias tradiciones familiares que inclu\u00edan tarjetas navide\u00f1as, medias tejidas a mano,\nbuscar o crear los regalos perfectos, programas de la iglesia, conciertos, grandes comidas y reuniones\ncon familiares y amigos. Por no hablar del \u00e1rbol y las decoraciones, incluidas las docenas de pesebres\nque coleccion\u00e9 a lo largo de los a\u00f1os.<\/p>

Ahora, es el momento de la verificaci\u00f3n de la realidad. Con el paso de los a\u00f1os, los ni\u00f1os se han hecho\nadultos y han tenido sus propios hijos. \u00a1Durante muchos a\u00f1os, todos regresaron a casa para Navidad con\ntoda la emoci\u00f3n y todas las cosas que iban con ese "deber\u00eda" ser! Me encantaban esas grandes\nreuniones, y nada trae m\u00e1s diversi\u00f3n a la Navidad que tener ni\u00f1os peque\u00f1os alrededor. Pero como todo\nen la vida, los a\u00f1os pasan y las cosas cambian. Ah\u00ed est\u00e1 el problema... No quiero que las cosas cambien.<\/p>

Quiero aferrarme a mis expectativas para la Navidad que est\u00e1n enterradas en lo profundo de mi coraz\u00f3n\ndonde nadie las ve. Quiero continuar para siempre experimentando la maravilla de esas viejas\n"Navidades de Michigan". Cuando comenc\u00e9 a pensar por qu\u00e9 me sent\u00eda triste este a\u00f1o cuando se\n\nacercaba la Navidad, me di cuenta de que era porque me resist\u00eda al cambio. La realidad es que las cosas\nhan cambiado mucho. Mis hijos se fueron y se casaron. Sus hijos est\u00e1n comenzando a irse de casa y\nest\u00e1n comenzando a regresar a sus propios hogares para las vacaciones. Siempre quise que mis hijos\ncrearan sus propias tradiciones familiares, pero ahora es m\u00e1s dif\u00edcil saber d\u00f3nde encajo yo en esa\nimagen. Ya no vienen a mi casa, as\u00ed que durante varios a\u00f1os Dave y yo \u00edbamos a sus casas el d\u00eda de\nNavidad. Y ahora incluso Dave se ha ido.<\/p>

Las cosas est\u00e1n cambiando m\u00e1s r\u00e1pidamente de lo que yo quisiera. Los ni\u00f1os son adultos, la mayor\u00eda de\nlos nietos son adultos, no hay peque\u00f1os que despierten la emoci\u00f3n. La Navidad para m\u00ed ha cambiado\ndr\u00e1sticamente, pero una cosa permanece. El prop\u00f3sito sigue siendo celebrar el d\u00eda m\u00e1s lleno de\nesperanza en la historia humana: el nacimiento de Cristo. Mientras miro el resto, se me ocurre que\nnecesitamos manejar nuestras expectativas. Especialmente si est\u00e1 en una temporada de duelo, esto se\nvuelve cr\u00edtico. Aqu\u00ed hay algunas cosas que pueden ayudar a aliviar el estr\u00e9s y los colapsos emocionales.<\/p>

Primero, haga una lista de las expectativas que tiene acerca de las fiestas. Puede clasificarlos en\ncategor\u00edas si le resulta \u00fatil: tradiciones, obligaciones, h\u00e1bitos y cosas que disfruta hacer. Algunas cosas\nsolo las hacemos porque siempre las hemos hecho. Otras cosas son tradiciones que queremos\nmantener. A veces, otras personas tienen expectativas de nosotros, como ser los anfitriones de la\nreuni\u00f3n familiar y cocinar.<\/p>

Una vez que haya identificado las expectativas, piense cu\u00e1les le causan m\u00e1s estr\u00e9s. \u00bfSe siente con ganas\nde asistir a fiestas y eventos sociales? \u00bfPodr\u00e1 gestionar las tarjetas este a\u00f1o? \u00bfNecesita simplificar las\ncompras? Es posible que descubra que es mejor para usted simplemente eliminar algunas de estas\ncosas. Tal vez no se sienta con ganas de manejar las decoraciones durante un a\u00f1o o dos. Haga los\ncambios necesarios para mantener su enfoque en la celebraci\u00f3n y la verdadera raz\u00f3n de la misma. Si\nalgo no ser\u00e1 importante dentro de tres meses, probablemente est\u00e9 bien simplificarlo.<\/p>

Hay mucha gracia y paz al darse cuenta de que nuestro Padre Celestial no tiene expectativas para\nnosotros. \u00a1No tenemos que cumplir una lista de cosas para \u00c9l antes de Navidad! \u00c9l nos ama tal como\nsomos, ya sea que estemos o no desempe\u00f1\u00e1ndonos al m\u00e1ximo de nuestra capacidad. T\u00f3mese un tiempo\ndurante esta temporada navide\u00f1a para simplemente sentarse con \u00c9l en silencio, reflexionando sobre el\nmilagro de todo lo que ha hecho por nosotros. \u00c9l se reunir\u00e1 con usted en ese lugar tranquilo y le\nasegurar\u00e1 a su coraz\u00f3n que solo act\u00faa para una Audiencia de Uno.<\/p>

Que tenga una maravillosa Navidad y si\u00e9ntase libre de dejar sus pensamientos y comentarios o\nenviarme un correo electr\u00f3nico a sheryl@freshhope.us.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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Examining Expectations Subscribe to our Blog With Thanksgiving recently past and Christmas coming up quickly, I\u2019ve been spending some time reading articles, posts, and books…<\/p>","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":645,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_mi_skip_tracking":false,"_customify_content_layout":"","_customify_sidebar":"","_customify_page_header_display":"default","_customify_disable_header":"","_customify_disable_header_top":"","_customify_disable_header_main":"","_customify_disable_header_bottom":"","_customify_disable_page_title":"","_customify_disable_content_vertical_padding":"","_customify_disable_footer_top":"","_customify_disable_footer_main":"","_customify_disable_footer_bottom":"","_customify_breadcrumb_display":"","_customify_header_transparent_display":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[40,41,25,14,9,21,48,31,11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-622","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-anxiety","category-depression","category-grief","category-holidays","category-inspirational","category-linkinbio","category-moving-ahead","category-peer-to-peer-support","category-personal-growth"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nExamining Expectations - Refocusing Widows<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"With Thanksgiving recently past and Christmas coming up quickly, I\u2019ve been spending some time reading articles, posts, and books on how grief impacts our ability to successfully navigate the holidays. A Google search will produce literally hundreds of \u201chelpful hints\u201d, and lots of ideas as to how we can survive the coming weeks. In fact, I read three books this week with the word survive, surviving, or survival in the topic! That caused me to begin to wonder when a celebration of the birth of the Savior, the one who brought hope to us, became something that we must endure, or survive!? How is it that the single most hopeful event in all human history has become a burden to us? The holiday season is, admittedly, the most stress-inducing time of the year. But why? Why does it weigh on us so heavily? 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That caused me to begin to wonder when a celebration of the birth of the Savior, the one who brought hope to us, became something that we must endure, or survive!? How is it that the single most hopeful event in all human history has become a burden to us? The holiday season is, admittedly, the most stress-inducing time of the year. But why? Why does it weigh on us so heavily? 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A Google search will produce literally hundreds of \u201chelpful hints\u201d, and lots of ideas as to how we can survive the coming weeks. In fact, I read three books this week with the word survive, surviving, or survival in the topic! That caused me to begin to wonder when a celebration of the birth of the Savior, the one who brought hope to us, became something that we must endure, or survive!? How is it that the single most hopeful event in all human history has become a burden to us? The holiday season is, admittedly, the most stress-inducing time of the year. But why? Why does it weigh on us so heavily? Why are so many overwhelmed with suffocating emotions, and paralyzing depression?","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/es\/examining-expectations\/","og_locale":"es_MX","og_type":"article","og_title":"Examining Expectations - Refocusing Widows","og_description":"With Thanksgiving recently past and Christmas coming up quickly, I\u2019ve been spending some time reading articles, posts, and books on how grief impacts our ability to successfully navigate the holidays. A Google search will produce literally hundreds of \u201chelpful hints\u201d, and lots of ideas as to how we can survive the coming weeks. In fact, I read three books this week with the word survive, surviving, or survival in the topic! That caused me to begin to wonder when a celebration of the birth of the Savior, the one who brought hope to us, became something that we must endure, or survive!? How is it that the single most hopeful event in all human history has become a burden to us? The holiday season is, admittedly, the most stress-inducing time of the year. But why? Why does it weigh on us so heavily? Why are so many overwhelmed with suffocating emotions, and paralyzing depression?","og_url":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/es\/examining-expectations\/","og_site_name":"Refocusing Widows","article_published_time":"2022-12-08T21:43:20+00:00","article_modified_time":"2025-04-01T15:49:26+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1080,"height":1080,"url":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/RW-Post-2.png","type":"image\/png"}],"author":"Sheryl Gehrls","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Escrito por":"Sheryl Gehrls","Tiempo de lectura":"6 minutos"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/"},"author":{"name":"Sheryl Gehrls","@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/#\/schema\/person\/f16be15a9dc2e32b38ef3cc04e226d7e"},"headline":"Examining Expectations","datePublished":"2022-12-08T21:43:20+00:00","dateModified":"2025-04-01T15:49:26+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/"},"wordCount":1134,"commentCount":0,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/#organization"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/RW-Post-2.png","articleSection":["Anxiety","Depression","Grief","Holidays","Inspirational","Linkinbio","Moving Ahead","Peer to Peer Support","Personal Growth"],"inLanguage":"es","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/","url":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/","name":"Examining Expectations - Refocusing Widows","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/examining-expectations\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/refocusingwidows.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/RW-Post-2.png","datePublished":"2022-12-08T21:43:20+00:00","dateModified":"2025-04-01T15:49:26+00:00","description":"With Thanksgiving recently past and Christmas coming up quickly, I\u2019ve been spending some time reading articles, posts, and books on how grief impacts our ability to successfully navigate the holidays. 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