Who we are
Refocusing Widows is a faith-based ministry initiative under the umbrella of Fresh Hope. We utilize research-supported peer-to-peer support structures, as well as personal coaching, to encourage widows to embrace and move through their grief to a new season of growth and personal accomplishment.
Our Vision
The Vision of Refocusing Widows is a simple one: “We envision a host of women who have embraced grief, discovered their new identity, and leveraged their strengths and gifts so that they are empowered to change the world around them.”
Our Mission
Refocusing Widows exists to identify, provide resources and coaching, and establish a peer-to-peer support community for widowed individuals.
Refocusing Principles
Learning to live well, and to experience a joy-filled, abundant life in spite of the loss of my spouse.
I have experienced the profound grief of losing my spouse. Because only another widow can truly identify, I choose to seek help and support from other widows in a safe environment where I can share my pain, my struggles, and my victories.
And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near. – Hebrews 10:24-25
Grief can be intense and overwhelming, sometimes manifesting in unexpected sadness, exhaustion, or medical issues resulting from fulltime caregiving. As part of my grief recovery, I choose to prioritize my self-care, getting plenty of sleep, exercise, and giving attention to my personal health.
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So, glorify God in your body. – I Corinthians 6:19-20
“Widow Fog” is a real brain chemistry condition that keeps me from thinking clearly. It robs me of my ability to function, and causes me to feel hopeless, helpless, and unable to make decisions. Amid this indecision, I choose to seek wisdom from appropriate family and/or mentors to guide me. Each successful decision builds my self-confidence to believe I can manage successfully on my own.
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.
– James 1:5
In becoming a widow, I experienced a profound loss of identity. I am no longer a “We” but am learning to live as an “I”. To facilitate that journey of self-discovery, I choose to explore my own preferences and interests, and find what my new roles will be. I choose to not be defined by my loss, but rather to build confidence in who “I” am.
I will praise You; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are your works; and that my soul knows right well.
—Psalms 139:14
Sometimes I feel as though I’ve lost my purpose and direction. I often find myself asking, “What comes next?” During this painful time, I choose to seek wise counsel, and to spend time seeking what God’s new purpose will be for me as I move ahead into the next season of my life.
For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. — Ephesians 2:10
All my relationships with friends and family were impacted when my spouse died, leaving me to find new roles and ways of relating. I choose not to be offended or take it personally when these relationships seem to disappear. Rather, I choose to begin to build new relationships, sharing with others for the mutual good of myself and those around me.
Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! — Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
Living as a widow can cause fear and anxiety that I’ve never experienced before. In the face of many unknowns, I choose to walk in an opposite spirit of confidence, knowing that God has promised to care for widows and give special attention to their needs.
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. – Isaiah 41:10
Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” – Matthew 11:28-30
Grief has launched me into an unfamiliar world of finances, home maintenance, vehicles, and dozens of daily decisions. To help me negotiate this maze, I choose to identify resources and networks that can help me manage daily life.
So continue encouraging each other and building each other up, just like you are doing already. — I Thessalonians 5:11
Grief can cause debilitating loneliness. When I focus only on myself and my needs, I believe the lie that no one cares about me. Because focusing on others will help me process the grief, I choose to seek community, and to share my story with others, thereby helping them to grow and live well.
God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them. – Hebrews 6:10
Unprocessed grief can lead to despair, causing me to believe I will never again experience joy in my life. Recognizing that grief will never be “gone”, I choose to seek God’s perspective and to refocus my energy on the future. I choose to embrace the loss and intentionally seek to discover my new purpose and calling, knowing that God has a plan to redeem my pain.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. – Jeremiah 29:11
Meet our founder
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