Uniqueness of being a Widow
He experimentado el profundo dolor de perder a mi cónyuge. Debido a que solo otra viuda puede identificarse verdaderamente, elijo buscar ayuda y apoyo de otras viudas en un entorno seguro donde pueda compartir mi dolor y luchas, así como mis victorias.
“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together,
as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” – Hebrews 10:24-25
Personal Wellness & Self-care
El dolor puede ser intenso y abrumador, y a veces se manifiesta en tristeza inesperada, agotamiento o problemas médicos como resultado de la prestación de cuidados de tiempo completo. Como parte de mi recuperación del duelo, elijo prestar atención a mi propio cuidado personal, dormir lo suficiente, hacer ejercicio y prestar atención a mi salud personal.
“Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God?
You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So, glorify God in your body.” – I Corinthians 6:19-20
Widow Fog and Decision-making
"Widow Fog (Confusión de Viuda)" es una condición química del cerebro real que me impide pensar con claridad. Me priva de mi capacidad para funcionar y me hace sentir desesperada, desamparada e incapaz de tomar decisiones. En medio de esta indecisión, elijo buscar la sabiduría de la familia apropiada y / o mentores que me guíen. Cada decisión exitosa fortalece mi confianza en mí misma para creer que puedo manejarme exitosamente por mi cuenta.
“Si a alguno de ustedes le falta sabiduría, pídasela a Dios, y él se la dará, pues Dios da a todos generosamente sin menospreciar a nadie. – Santiago 1:5”– James 1:5
Discovering My New Identity, Preferences, and Life Roles
In becoming a widow, I experienced a profound change of my identity. I am no longer a “We” but am learning to live as an “I”. To facilitate that journey of self-discovery, I choose to explore my own preferences and interests, and find what my new roles will be. I choose to not be defined by my loss, but rather to build confidence in who “I” am.
“Te alabaré; porque formidable y maravillosamente he sido hecha: maravillosas son tus obras; y que mi alma lo sabe bien.
--Salmos 139:14”– Psalms 139:14
Finding My New Tribe
Grief can cause debilitating loneliness, because all my relationships with friends and family were impacted when my spouse died. When I focus only on myself and my needs, I am tempted to believe the lie that no one cares about me. I choose not to be offended when these relationships seem to disappear. Rather, I choose to begin building new relationships, because focusing on others will help me process the grief. I also choose to seek community, and to share my story with others, thereby helping
them to grow and live well.
“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!” — Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
“God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.” – Hebrews 6:10
Overcoming Fear and Anxiety
Living as a widow can cause fears and anxieties that I’ve never experienced before. In the face of many unknowns, I choose to walk in an opposite spirit of confidence, knowing that God has promised to care for widows and give special attention to their needs.
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” – Isaiah 41:10
Being on my own has launched me into an unfamiliar world of finances, home maintenance, vehicles, and dozens of daily decisions. To help me negotiate this maze, I choose to identify resources and networks that can help me manage daily life.
“So continue encouraging each other and building each other up, just like you are doing already.”
— I Thessalonians 5:11
Finding My Purpose and Direction
Sometimes I find myself asking, “What comes next?” Knowing that unprocessed grief can lead to despair and recognizing that grief will never be “gone”, I choose to seek wise counsel, and to spend time seeking what God’s new purpose will be for me as I move ahead into the next season of my life. I choose to seek God’s perspective and to refocus my energy on the future, knowing God has a plan to redeem my pain.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11
“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”– Ephesians 2:10